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In a new interview with the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, Mary McDonnell discusses the beginning of her career, the effect of ego and fame on the working actor, and more.

Listen to the audio of the interview here: MM-Pittsburgpost

Tell me what was it like the first time you heard applause?

Oh, what an interesting question. The first time I heard applause I think on the level that you mean, I actually was crowned Miss Teenage Ithaca [laughing]. It was back in probably, 1968. I found it very reassuring. It’s interesting what applause is for a performer. Really and truly it means a connection has been made. A lot of times, people think performers are sort of showoffs and live for the applause, but in fact, many performers are very shy. When the applause comes it means they connected in places where they otherwise might not be able to connect in a kind of generally social way.

The fame thing has kind of tainted the craft.

I do understand what you mean in that, at this point in our culture, there is much more self-consciousness, and it’s sort of the era of “I” and “me.” The iPhone, the iPad [laughing] you know what I mean? So there is a lot of putting oneself into a position of fame that we didn’t used to have access to, and that has kind of skewed the way we think about things for sure.

That said, was there ever a time you questioned the value of what you do?

I’ve never really questioned the value of it, but I have questioned some of the difficulties that one runs into having a career as an actor. There is sometimes such deep, deep insecurity and times of complete unknown that can really be very hurtful. You have to have such a strong core and self-esteem to navigate it. Not everybody who is given a talent is also given the tools by which to build that faith. You know, you’ve gotta have faith to know that it’s going to keep going because there are moments when you have nothing ahead of you.

As an adult and when you’re a parent and an actor, it can be truly devastating to approach the abyss. There is a void ahead of you, and you don’t have a job and you don’t know when the next one will come.

You have talked about focusing on positive energy. At what point in your life did you start doing that?

It was pretty early on. When I was an actress on stage in New York, my early years were really, really tough. I didn’t really have a path, and I wasn’t quite sure of how to go there. I was always living on the brink of poverty, really [laughs]. Not to sound dramatic, but everybody was in those days. I lived in an apartment that was $90 a month, and the bathroom was in the hallway and there was a bathtub in the kitchen, so it was a kind of New York lifestyle.

I think somewhere in there I realized I had a positive energy in my upbringing. We were raised to compete and we were raised to win, and we were raised as a family of sisters and then finally a brother. My parents instilled in us that we could attempt to do anything that we wanted. So I didn’t grow up with a limited sense of myself as a woman. I realized I was going to have to develop in myself a way to sustain better images on a daily basis. It took me a long, long time to figure out what that really meant. At this point in my life, I am feeling positive more than negative [laughing], which I really love!

Read the rest of the interview here.